customers say the darndest things

so, this old guy comes up to me looking for info on Grace Metalious author of peyton place. he says he heard she was destroyed by the book and never did anything else. he's dying to know about her. well, we have no books about her, just peyton place. so, i'm showing him our biography resource center so he can look up articles on her.


he says to me: i can't believe a woman could write anything so powerful.

WTH??? first of all, peyton place is a soap opera on paper. they turned it into a soap opera on t.v. in the 60's too.
i'm not even going to address the woman thing. fat old ass.

i should have told him how feminine he was for thinking that about a damned soap.

heeerreee's terry!

so, one of my booklists is on our library's website, check it out!

we take all kinds

so, there i was, the Librarian In Charge (LIC) when one of my employees comes up to me and says there's a guy, locked himself in the bathroom and is soliceting sex.

i tiptoe into the men's room, scooby-doo style, all quiet.  sure enough, there's a napkin that says something like: do you like to play?  i like to play?  knock twice on the stall next door for some sexy fun. 

it goes on to describe types of sexy fun.

i tiptoe out as fast as my toes will carry me and call the local popo.

the cops show up en masse.  with gloves on.

one cop told me he looked over the stall to make sure the guy doesn't have any weapons and this is what he saw:  big guy, wearing silk stockings, a bra, and a very very very very small and lacy thong.  his junk is out.

he was too embarrassed to come out of the stall so it took 30 minutes to arrest him and get him to the car.  just about 10 minutes before 150 middle schoolers swarmed into the building.  *shudder*

when i banned him from the property he kept telling me how sorry he was.